I haven't written a lot lately, because I mostly like to engage with positive topics. Well, I wrote this poem last night, called Father's Day.
To me, Father’s Day use to mean something different
I used to be thankful for what I had that others didn’t
Now I think about what others have and who I’m missin
My life’s mission, the one I should be kissin.
My baby girl.
I should have been there when she entered this world.
But what was meant to be my family, became insanity.
Cause her mother was mad at me, she tried to madden me
I’m not angry but it saddens me.
And now I’m stuck.
I’m stuck because I’m visiting instead of parenting.
My daughter and a woman who told me she would marry me.
And now it hurts to breathe, hurts to read, and I plead
To God to put a lot of care in me, and to carry me.
I have places to go, people to see
I don’t want a deep hole to be,
the place to go
Buried in snow,
flooded with tears,
for the rest of our years.
I want to go home,
and I don’t mean Heaven or Hell.
Home is the place where I can hold my Ana-belle.
But I’m in Hell on earth. I missed her birth.
Seems like I’m going to be missing all of her firsts.
and even measuring skirts.
Damn does it hurt.
This pain I hide, the tears I’ve cried.
With a cut this deep, I’m surprised I’m alive.
Luckily I’m not squirmish, but what did I do to deserve it?
Let me know if you’ve heard it.
I hear revenge is cold, but I’m not gonna serve it
You better believe, forgiveness is what I hope to achieve.
Understanding on how someone could straight up deceive.
To become a kidnapper and thief, of what she promised me.
I need to pray more, for what I need to pray for.
And before I say more, I’ll reflect on what Father’s Day’s for.